I thought I’d put down in words what it feels like to have a love a strong black man. I feel like a lot of Black Men get a bad rap. Maybe we as black women should stop knocking them down and start to build them up. As with any thing- not every man out there will be the same, and you can’t always go on previous bad experiences of your own or others. Many of us are blessed with strong, caring, loving and family orientated men. I’m sure there are many women out there you have a man who will make them laugh until they cry and comfort them when they are down.
I see many examples of great black fathers out there, whether they are with the mother of their children or not. There is a lot of love out there but if we keep on demoralising and adding negativity towards them, then men may grow up with lower expectations of themselves. Remember many black women are also raising black sons who will grow up to be ‘one of these black men’ and I don’t believe that it is true that all of these young males will grow up to be a reflection of the negative stereotypes that exist in society today.
Not all black men are in gangs. Not all black men are no-hopers. There are thousands of successful Black Male Lawyers, Doctors, Business men and so forth. There are black men who want to do more than just go to the cinema for a date- there are cultured black men who want to go to expand your mind by going to Theatre, Opera or what about Skiing, travelling the world or just going for walks and talking.
Black women need to support their men and create a stronger united front and not simply jump on the ‘hate-all-black-men-bandwagon.’
Remember, you can still be a self-sufficient black woman, who earns a good wage and is surrounded by good friends but you can also be supported and enriched by a real black man who can lift you when you are down, and raise you even higher when you are up.
Ladies, don’t listen to everything your girlfriends will say to you! Yes, I said i! There will be fellow ladies who unfortunately will have had bad situations and messy relationship breakdowns. This does not mean they will necessarily have the best advice for you because they are coming from a different place. Beware of the ‘friends’ who are quick to tell you to ‘leave him’ when you’ve had an argument so they can have another single buddy to chill with on a friday and saturday night.
Trust me, these same women may WANT what you have! I mean, who doesn’t want stability? Who doesn’t want another better half? Who doesn’t want to experience true love? True love is not smooth sailing and it doesn’t pretend to be! It is about taking the rough with the smooth.Women, if you treat your man well, you will get treated well yourself. Good relationships are not without hard work and daily effort.
So on that note! Women, love your men and let them know that they are special in each and every way and show and tell them that you love them each and every day.